I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Randomize
