This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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