just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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