in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
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