theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
