He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
