This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
