Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
