i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
