Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Randomize