didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
