Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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