So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
OPIZZABONMYDICK
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
