I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
