Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I puked a lego.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
