Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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