thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
