So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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