she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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