i jhust puked up my retainher.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize
