quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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