so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize