I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
