i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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