I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
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