You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Randomize
