she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
