love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
