No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
