So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
