i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
