i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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