I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize