One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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