yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
