Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
