It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
