So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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