I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
