She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
