And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Randomize
