"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
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