I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
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