We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Your topless pictures make me question reality
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
