If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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