I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
