hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
