just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
