Betty ford says i'm here all night
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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