4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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