Just mADE A PArabola og urine
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
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